A old man hears the doorbell ring on the night of his 100th birthday. He opens the door to see a beautiful young woman in a babydoll nighty. She opens a card and reads, "It's your hundredth birthday, Grampa, and I've sent you a present I know you'll enjoy"!
She puts the card away and begins to undo her top, at which point gramps says, "What're you doing! Where's my present?" She says, "I'm here to give you SUPER sex"! He thinks about it for a minute and then says, "Well then, I guess I'll take the soup"!
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
My 45th Birthday
Oh, the embarrassment....
Two weeks ago was my 45th birthday and I wasn't feeling too good that morning. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and probably have a present for me. As it turned out, she didn't even say good morning, let alone any happy birthday.
I thought, well, that's wives for you, the children will remember.
The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary Janet said, "Good morning, Boss. Happy Birthday!". And I felt a little better that someone had remembered. I worked until noon, then Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your birthday...let's go to lunch, just you and me.
" I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. "Let's go!" We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go instead we went out to a private little place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously. On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?" I said, "No, I guess not.
" She said, "Let's go to my apartment.
" After arriving at her apartment she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable." "Sure!" I excitedly replied. She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake ----- followed by my wife, children, and dozens of our friends, all singing Happy Birthday.
And I just sat there ---- on the couch ---- naked.
Two weeks ago was my 45th birthday and I wasn't feeling too good that morning. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!", and probably have a present for me. As it turned out, she didn't even say good morning, let alone any happy birthday.
I thought, well, that's wives for you, the children will remember.
The children came in to breakfast and didn't say a word. So when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary Janet said, "Good morning, Boss. Happy Birthday!". And I felt a little better that someone had remembered. I worked until noon, then Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside, and it is your birthday...let's go to lunch, just you and me.
" I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. "Let's go!" We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go instead we went out to a private little place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously. On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office, do we?" I said, "No, I guess not.
" She said, "Let's go to my apartment.
" After arriving at her apartment she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable." "Sure!" I excitedly replied. She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake ----- followed by my wife, children, and dozens of our friends, all singing Happy Birthday.
And I just sat there ---- on the couch ---- naked.
Billy here!
A BIG welcome to my friends in the land of the internet.
My blog should hopefully bring a smile to your face. Please drop any comments you'd like to make.
My blog should hopefully bring a smile to your face. Please drop any comments you'd like to make.
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